Foundation of a Feeling
by Jessica1988
Summary: While on a mission from Jonathan, Daine and Numair must learn to see what's before their very eyes. Set after Emporer Mage. Updated! DN
1. Chapter 1

"Daine

"Daine?"

She knew Numair was watching her very closely. She was sat at the fifth banquet dinner she had attended since returning to Corus from Carthak. And yes, she was counting. The only problem with Numair's actions was that she simply couldn't return his gaze. It still felt like only yesterday when she heard that Arram Draper, her Numair, had been killed. The rush of feeling at the moment she discovered his very-much-alive form was just too much for her, her thoughts were too muddled and her only action was to bury herself in him – desperate never to lose him again.

Daine was fairly certain those last few days at Carthak would stay with her forever, however much she might wish to forget them. It was the thoughts tumbling through her mind as she stormed the castle that made her really think about what Numair really meant to her. She had felt the pain of losing her Ma and while that still troubled her under the surface, it was nothing to the idea constantly with her now, what if Numair had died?

"Yes, Numair?"

They were sat together, and the conversation between them was nothing louder than a murmur.

"What's wrong?" Numair half whispered

"Nothing, just tired, I guess," the girl replied

He didn't reply though she knew she wasn't fooling him. She also knew she had to understand her own feelings before confessing anything to her teacher and friend. She couldn't stand the idea of him being with Varice, that much she was certain. The Banquet was coming to a close, and she could slip away now without being much noticed, but she had to ask one question.

"Do you miss her? Varice, I mean"

Numair's eyes searched her own, trying to understand hidden meaning behind the question.

"Varice was, well, a good companion… but that was a long time ago. We discovered how much we had both changed when we were reunited, I have a new life now"

Daine half smiled, hoping he was sincere, hoping he wouldn't be wanting to bed any more plump blondes in the near future.

"How about you, Magelet, do you miss Kaddar?"

Now that question she definitely wasn't expecting, but she tried to explain.

"Kaddar, though being far better at his job than his Uncle, was never any more than a friend. Me n him are very different, you know."

A memory struck her.

"I can't believe you said all that about suitors at the Carthaki Banquet!" she grinned up at him, feeling better for the discussion. She shook her head, smiling to herself.

"Well, I can't have my Magelet being taken advantage of, can I? Even by Carthaki Princes!" Numair replied, his eyes twinkling.

"At this rate, you'll never let me have any suitors at all!" Daine retorted, as she made her move to quit the table. "Not that I wanted him, anyway."

She was so busy negotiating the chairs around her, she didn't hear Numair's whispered "Oh yes, I will, Magelet."

Numair turned back to his food.


	2. Chapter 2

"Daine

Daine lay musing in bed that night. She wasn't usually one to deliberate on a dilemma for so long and in normal circumstances when given a problem, she much preferred to shake a stick at it rather than lie awake thinking the same old thoughts, over and over again. Eventually, she sighed and turned over. She didn't understand what was happening to her and she supposed she wasn't likely to understand it any time soon either. Time to sleep, she told her mind, crossly.

She awoke with a start to the sound of knocking at the door. It was still well before dawn but the mysterious caller didn't seem to have any problem with that. Wearily, Daine slid out of bed and slowly opened the door.

"Daine!"

Through her half-closed eyes she could still make out the identity of her caller; Evin Larse was evidently at court. Smiling slowly and sleepily, she stood back to admit him into her quarters.

"I'm so sorry to call so late, but I just heard you were back! I couldn't wait to see you!"

Evin threw his hands around Daine's startled neck, embracing her enthusiastically.

"It's really good to see you too, Evin" said Daine, once she'd recovered, "what've you been doing all this time?"

Immediately, the regretted her question and sighed inwardly. She resigned herself to a severe lack of sleep this night as Evin begun to regale her with stories of the Riders and the odd bit of gossip, too. Daine nodded in the right places and smiled at Evin. In an odd way, she was grateful for the distraction.

--

The next day, Daine made her way to the stables. Cloud was always a comfort in times like this, her horse sense was invariably both simplistic and incredibly logical.

She relished these conversations with Cloud and after a while, she felt more clarity than she had in weeks.

"I should get back to the castle," she murmured "they'll be getting worried."

"Go then, get back to your Storkman"

"He's not my Storkman!" was her retort.

The door creaked and a rustle across the stable made her turn her head. Evin was walking confidently towards her.

"There you are Daine!"

His hand slipped around her, slowly caressing her side. She turned towards him but before she could react, he called out.

"Here you are Numair! I found our Daine!"

There, in the entrance of the stables, was Numair Salmalin, looking more lost than he had in years.


	3. Chapter 3

"Daine

Numair quickly regained his composure enough to say grimly,

"Daine? Jonathan needs us"

The girl jumped at the sound of his voice and pulled herself away from Evin's embrace. Keeping her eyes on her teacher, she walked up to him.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"No idea. I suggest we go search for him and find out" he replied coldly.

"Yes, of course. See you later, Evin" she replied breezily, trying unsuccessfully to lighten the atmosphere. The forced herself not to turn round and look at the confused rider.

Numair and Daine walked for a while in silence, Numair taking long strides with Daine hurrying by his side. Eventually, as she was started to lose her breath, she decided she'd had enough of the silent treatment.

"What's wrong, Numair?"

"With me? Nothing at all"

"It doesn't look like nothing at all to me." She muttered, "If it's about Evin, we're just friends. He was just happy to see me after so long."

"From what I hear, he was happy to see you last night, too" he returned, stony faced, looking straight in front of him.

"Numair! You can't be suggesting that me n Evin are… canoodling? We're just friends, like I said." She was lost for words, she didn't know what to say to convince him. She wasn't exactly sure why she HAD to convince him.

"Well, what with Kaddar, Perin, Evin…" he started, but didn't go on. He stopped in front of the castle.

"Well, what about them?" Daine repied, angrily. Flicking unruly curls from her face, she turned to face him, glaring up at her teacher.

He took a deep breath and returned her look. Slowly, he bent down, so he was at her eye line.

"I'm sorry, Magelet" he murmured "I guess it's hard for you to know the effect you can have on men. Even without you knowing it."

"ME?!" This conversation was getting too strange for her liking.

"Yes, you. Now, shall we go see what Jon wants?" Without waiting for an answer, he opened the door and led the way to the King's study.


	4. Chapter 4

Jonathan sat at his chair in his study, silently studying a report in front of him

Jonathan sat at his chair in his study, silently studying a report in front of him. A flood had hit the nearby town of Haldum and was proving to be just one in a long line of disasters that had hit this particular part of the countryside. Haldum had seen its fair share of unrest before, followed by a spate of bandits and now flooding. Jonathan moved his hands to his temples and continued to pore over his report. A niggling thought kept jumping to the forefront of his mind: what if the problems in Haldum were far deeper than he had originally thought? What kind of problems would they even be? He simply had no idea.

His thought-pattern was disrupted by a knock at the door. Jon heaved a sigh and straightened himself up in his chair, he smiled as Daine and Numair were admitted into the room.

"Ah there you are, you two!" Jonathan calmly ushered the pair to sit. "Glad you managed to find Daine eventually, Numair. With so many animal friends, our Daine must be hard to find at times!" He smiled warmly at the wildmage, who was looking decidedly uncomfortable. 'And so many human friends too, male human friends, to be precise' thought Numair. He was spared any need to respond as Daine interjected,

"I'm so sorry! I had no idea you were looking for me! I was just talking to Cloud in the stables…" she trailed off. It occurred to her that going to talk out problems with her horse was probably not something nobility did very often. Jonathan, however, didn't seem to notice anything amiss and merely continued,

"No problem at all! I just needed to ask you both a favour, really." He described the problems at Haldum to them as quickly as he could. "My problem is, Daine, that the flooding has taken out a lot of the livestock there and the residents need the help badly. They've lost their horses for trade and their oxen for the fields…"

"…and the rest of it, to eat" Daine added

"Well, I'm afraid, yes Daine. But I'm not expecting you to help with anything like that. I need your help to see the surrounding area, find out what happened to their livestock – it can't all have simply 'disappeared' in the flood…"

Daine nodded and slowly looked towards Numair. He was thinking deeply, she could always tell. He was staring into middle-distance, one hand absent-mindedly by his face. It made her long to take his hand in hers and force him to look her in the eyes. She yearned to look up into his eyes and understand everything about him, though she knew it could never happen. She was broken from her reverie by Numair's reply,

"It does seem rather strange that so many things should befall one town within so short a time span… especially if so much expensive livestock is now missing…makes one almost think…"

"And that's why I need you there too, Numair. I need you to check whether this flood was indeed a force of nature or of a decidedly more human origin. We can decide on a more definite plan of action once I know what we're up against here."

The mage nodded slowly. It seemed to him to be the best course of action. The meeting ended once the pair knew all their duties and they both took their leave of Jonathan.

"So…" Daine begun once they were out of the room "first thing tomorrow morning, then?" She smiled hopefully.

"Just as Jonathan said" Numair replied. "Goodnight, Daine" he murmured, before turning away from her and making his way to his own quarters, leaving a confused Daine in his wake.


	5. Chapter 5

Rubbing her eyes tiredly, Daine stumbled out of bed at first light next morning

Rubbing her eyes tiredly, Daine stumbled out of bed at first light next morning. Heaving a sigh, she dressed herself quickly and went down to breakfast. She wasn't looking forward to the long ride to Haldum, especially if Numair insisted on behaving so distantly all the way there. She was one of the first to the hall and she took a seat out of the way of general viewing, preferring to be alone with her thoughts this morning. Her recent admirer, however, was having other ideas. She was soon joined by a very awake looking Evin. Looking up at the rider, she half-smiled. He was handsome, in his own way. His eyes twinkled, giving off an air of good humour and kindness. He had a way of making each woman he spoke to feel special, like they were the only woman for him. Fortunately, Daine herself knew of many a woman who believed herself in love with Evin and, more importantly, who believed he loved them back. She wasn't sure he did it on purpose but he did seem to have a way with the ladies.

"I hear you're leaving today, Daine" he said suddenly,

"Yeah, Numair n me are off to some town east of Corus" she replied,

"I'll miss you," he said, gazing at her intently,

"Oh, I won't be gone long… I'm sure you'll find something to distract you!" she laughed,

"I'm not sure… you're very special, you know that?"

Daine was lost for words, she felt like her brain wasn't capable of moving at the speed this conversation was going. It was far too early!

"Daine…"

She looked up automatically and met his eyes

"When I come back, would you like to go to the King's ball with me?"

"Oh… Evin… I'm not sure, I'm not really that good a dancer, anyway!"

"I'm sure you dance beautifully, Daine… say you'll go with me? We don't even have to dance, if you don't want."

"Evin, I really have to go get ready now. Maybe we'll talk about this some other time? Please? Sorry"

With that, Daine stood upright and made to leave the mess hall. She half walked, half ran out of there and stopped just as suddenly, as soon as she was sure she was out of the view of Evin.

Suddenly, she hated herself. 'I acted like such a child!' She told herself angrily. 'Why can't I be one those eloquent court ladies who smile serenely and subtly let men know they're not interested?' She heaved a deep sigh and rested her back against the wall. She closed her eyes for a moment and tried to compose herself. Soon, she heard a soft, comforting voice say,

"Magelet? Are you OK?" Through half-opened lashes, she could see Numair walking down the corridor towards her.

"Oh yeah, fine. Really." She tried to smile and walk up to him, back in the direction of the mess hall. Numair wasn't having any of it,

"You don't look well at all, Magelet… has anything upset you?" As he moved closer, she allowed herself to look up at him. His eyes were full of caring and she could tell he was trying to sort out a puzzle in his mind; it was exactly the same expression he wore yesterday in the King's office, only this time he was gazing at her. His arms were extended slightly, as if he were about to embrace her.

"Daine?" Came Evin's shout from the entrance of the hall. "Oh, Master Numair." Numair's hands shot down immediately to his side at the sound of a voice, and he turned round to see who was speaking. "I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were here. Well, just remember what I said, Daine. I'll see you soon, love." With that, Evin walked off the other way, hands in pockets.

"I'll take it you've already had your breakfast then, Daine?" Numair asked, rather sadly.

"Yes, I just need to go and saddle Cloud and Spots. I'll meet you at the stables at the next bell? I'd like to be out of here as soon as possible" She looked down at her feet. Numair nodded and she started walking towards the stable. She was wondering just what the King's ball would be like with a tall, dark haired friend accompanying her. She guessed she'd never know.


	6. Chapter 6

At the next bell, Daine and Numair were saddled and ready to ride. Numair set off first and Daine followed, as was their time-honoured tradition. They didn't normally talk on journeys like these, but their silence was normally a comfortable one; one that spoke of two people understanding each other beyond words. Most of the trek passed in silence until eventually Daine had had enough. She tried valiantly to think of something to say to her friend that wouldn't lead back to the meeting they'd had this morning. Eventually, she came out with:

"Can't believe how cold it's gotten already. The animals'll be hibernating soon, I guess"

Numair glanced back and gave her a small smile. 'Talking about the weather?!' Daine mentally rolled her eyes and concentrated on looking ahead of her. They were approaching Haldum now and the ground was so uneven that even an experienced rider had to be extra careful. A while later, Numair said:

"Let's stop now and eat. I don't suppose once we get into Haldum there will be much time for refreshments or the like."

Agreeing whole-heartedly, Daine dismounted and went to deal with the horses. Once she'd returned, she found her meal waiting for her beside Numair.

"Thanks"

She sat down beside him with a thump. She couldn't believe how tired she was and she didn't even know why, unless it was the backlash from Evin's late-night call two nights ago. She rested her back on a tree and closed her eyed. She could hear the chatter of birds all around her and smiled serenely. Even with Numair as silent and brooding as he was, there was still no place she'd rather be than in the woods, surrounded by animals, with Numair. Suddenly, he said:

"I'm sorry, Daine. I didn't realise you were so tired. I'll take it easier on the ride in."

"It's OK. I don't even know why I'm so tired. I'll be fine once I've got something to do."

She looked up at him and met his eyes slowly. He still seemed far away, lost in thought.

"Daine. You don't have to pretend for me. If you've found someone you… care for, then that's great. Not all of us are allowed that."

Daine cursed to herself. He really did believe her and Evin were canoodling.

"And what if someone cares for you, but you don't like them back? What then?"

She saw him tense up and take a deep breath before answering:

"If you don't like them back, you should tell them so, as kindly as possible. There's nothing worse than showing your feelings to someone and then being rejected. At least if you let them know, the agony can be shortened slightly."

Trust her and Numair to turn this into another lesson, she thought briefly.

"Ah. So I guess running out on Evin this morning when he asked me to the ball wasn't the kindest thing to do to him."

"You did what?!" It wasn't often she made Numair incredulous.

"Well, he asked me and I didn't WANT to go with him but I didn't want to tell him 'no' either, so I just kinda ran out."

As she turned to him, she was surprised to see something like a smirk come up on his face.

"Magelet, I do not doubt that that wasn't the most tactful way you could have declined his invitation."

That was definitely a smirk! Well at least she'd got him talking and smiling, even if it was at her expense.

"Do you think it was the right thing to do?"

"Only you can tell that. I, for one, am glad that you did. Now, shall we start moving?"

He jumped up suddenly and smiled at her. He held out his hands to lift her up off her seat and as she took them, their eyes met. For one glorious moment she was free to admire his dark, tender eyes and smile into them. Neither of them wanted to look away and the moment grew longer and longer. Eventually Numair muttered something about 'getting going' and Daine nodded slowly.

They remounted with their minds both fixed, not on the problem ahead, but on the friend riding beside them.


End file.
